 The key to my history, who taught me how to love with all that I am; I wonder sometimes who I would be without them...I'm glad I'll never know. My family. They showed me what unconditional love looks like and showed us all that choosing someone for better or worse is neither a fairy tale nor a myth. My parents.
The people who I can be completely me with, who love me no matter what, who I have treated like crap and vice versa - yet we'll have each other's backs for as long as we live. My siblings. The man who knows me at my very best and my very worst, who has grown up with me...Who makes me laugh and drives me crazy, but has become a person whom I can't imagine life without. My past, my present, my future. My husband. As they came along one-by-one, I was overwhelmed and amazed at how immediately you can fall completely in love with someone in the space of a single breath, heartbeat, cry. I'd never known a love quite like it...Couldn't imagine a greater love that wouldn't shatter my heart to pieces at its fullness. My nieces and nephews. The greatest love I have ever known. A love born before ever even seeing a face. The moment I felt that first movement in my belly, I was hers. Before she was even born, she became a person I couldn't live without. She is our everything. My daughter.
Weeks ago I applied for another online writing position with MomSquawk.com. I hadn't heard anything back over a week later so I thought I'd just send out another, 'hey I'm still here and I'd really like to write for you, e-mail,' (striving to leave out any vibes of desperation, mind you). A few days after that I heard back from them saying they had received an overwhelming response to their call for a Motherhood / Parenting writer and they had come up with a little something to spice things up a bit. What might that be, you're wondering? Well let me tell you because this is where you come in. We were given the option to write a short essay about a parenting lesson we'd learned, from there our essay would be posted on the MomSquawk Facebook page and the competition would begin. Competition, you say? Do tell...The writer whose essay collects the most comments between now and midnight on April 20 gets an automatic offer to write for MomSquawk. What to do: - Go to the MomSquawk Facebook page and 'Like' their page. (Without liking their page, you can't comment or like anything). Not quite sure what I'm talking about? No worries MomSquawk hooked us up with a screen shot to help us out.
- Go to my essay: Being Abby's Mom and leave a comment.
- Share it with your friends with these instructions.
- Give yourself a big, virtual super hug (or super squeezie as I would say to the little loves of my life) on my behalf.
Thanks so much for helping a girl out! I hope you enjoy my essay.
 Valentine's Day is officially behind us for another year. That big rush of air you randomly experienced? A collective sigh of relief from those who find Valentine's Day to be the most ridiculous of holidays, who see Valentine's Day as nothing but a sorry reminder of loss or whatever state of aloneness they might be experiencing. For other's still, it's just another day.
I don't remember the last time my husband and I actually did anything that would actually indicate a recognition of Valentine's Day as anything other than another day. (Yep, we're those people). I often wonder what people think this says about our relationship, but well, it's just not how we roll anymore. *shrugs* (I did remember to tell him "Happy Valentine's Day," though. You're jealous of the romance, aren't you?)
At family dinner tonight my mom went all out - the kids loved it and it was a fantastical kind of evening for us all, so I'm not totally "bah humbug" about it, but it certainly doesn't make my top 10 list of favorite days of the year. (Hmm, that implies I have a top 10 list...I'll get back to you on that).
Throughout the afternoon that I spent with my parents and the evening we all had together, more than once the phrase, "Bah humbug" turned up in conversation. This got me thinking. (Scary, I know). We most definitely need a phrase that is 'Bah humbugish' in nature that is for Valentine's Day alone. Just think of how beneficial such a phrase could be to so many. To the haters, the take-it-or-leave-it-ers (?), the closet lovers of the Day who need a front...Oh the masses for which such a phrase could benefit!
So let's get crackin'! What phrase can we create that can do for the anti-Cupids of Valentine's Day that Scrooge did for Christmas? Of course, we must keep in mind what happened at the end of Scrooge's tale, he did have a change of heart...Whose to say? But for now, let's find a Bah Humbug ---> Bah Lovebug? Nah. and start a new trend for all those who found Valentine's Day to be a little lacking in the sparkling love department. Hit me with your comments.
P.S. Even if you love Valentine's Day like nobody else's business, bust out your creativity and help the cause anyways.
Ahhh, hard to believe that 2010 is coming to a close already. New Year's Eve is a rather intriguing kind of a "holiday" to me. I really like getting together with friends and family and playing oodles of games and sharing lots of good food and laughter, but by the time midnight finally rolls around...It's kind of a letdown. It seems like there should be something more about this shift into a whole new year of fresh opportunities for change and growth, and yet...
As I look back over 2010 I'm proud of my venture into the world of professional writing and can only hope and pray for continued growth in this pursuit. I look at my gorgeous girl and can hardly believe she's four-years-old, has been out of diapers for the better part of a year, and has her ears pierced. We are less than two years away from kindergarten, which leaves me wondering just where I'm going to go once that happens.
Looking forward to 2011: I'm hoping Abby and I finally find our groove in working together on preschool stuff. I hope I continue to get picked up to do freelance work for Simply Family Magazine. I can hardly believe I will be 30 this year, and wonder if this will be the year where I officially feel like an adult. (Part of me doubts this will ever happen for me, I have too much kid inside, but ya never know). The husband and I will celebrate 9 married years together already. Madness! While my parents will celebrate a major landmark in their marriage; celebrating 40 years!
With much behind us, yet so very much to come, I guess it's okay if New Year's Eve doesn't live up to all its hype. Wishing you and your family a spectacular 2011!
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If you'd like to check out the New Year's articles up and running on my Examiner.com column:
 Disclaimer: I almost never write anything about my husband, simply because, well, I feel like that's one area of my life that should be off-limits, but in this case, I'm making an exception. I hope you enjoy.
For many families it seems either you are a solid 'real Christmas tree' family or you're 'artificial tree' all the way, however in my little family, we've waffled back and forth over the years (real shocker if you knew us at all...Insert dripping sarcasm here).
The year is 2002 and we're preparing for our first Christmas as a married couple. Let me just say, married life in general...BIG transition to say the least, but that's another story for another day. I, of course, am adamant that we get ourselves a real tree, so off we go to the various tree lots in search of the most perfect tree ever. The details on this part are a little fuzzy, but I'm pretty sure we ended up going to a few different lots before we found the tree. P.S. Two novices should not be allowed to go tree shopping together. I had gone with my dad every year while I was growing up to pick out the family tree, but he's the one who paid attention to the details - not me.
Now before I dive any further into this story, let me clue you in to a conversation we had while at the tree lot. Me: "We're gonna need to get a tree stand." Husband: "Eh, gramma has like 20 at home, we don't need to spend money on that." Me: "Okaaay...If you're sure..." (Thinking to self: If she has 'like 20 at home,' what's wrong with them???)
Okay, so fast forward to getting the tree home. The tree proceeds to go in and out of our house at least three times. Yep, you read that right THREE times. With each passage in and out the door as we (by we, I of course mean he) work on the most crooked tree trunk in the universe, the frustration levels are mounting. Finally, we get enough trunk cut off so that it can stand in our free tree stand. Guess what...There's a reason it was in the garage and not being used for a repeat performance. Oh yeah, it fell down. *sigh*
A new tree stand is purchased.
I can vividly recall as we're wrestling with this tree saying, "I wish my dad was here," and promptly going to the bathroom to cry it out. Now, the total irony of that statement is that things didn't necessarily go all that awesomely with my dad over the years. I remember many a time he was cursing over the stupid, er, beautiful tree. Apparently, though, I had blocked all of that out. So there I am, crying my eyes out in the bathroom, poor Husband is probably thinking this isnot what he signed up for - and seriously..."Why is she crying??" Enter my sister. My beautiful, thoughtful sister comes over with a box of ornaments for our first Christmas. I make my exit from the bathroom trying not to look like this entire experience has been complete misery. Ahh, good times.
The evening ended well, with feelings mended, and a ginormous pizza delivered from Pizza Hut, but it's an experience I will never forget, and that we uproariously laugh over now.
We did give the real tree a try again a couple of years later, but that darn thing fell over too, and we decided, enough is enough and have embraced our artificial tree in all it's easy-peasy glory ever since. Our greatest source of debate now is an annual argument over getting the lights on the tree. I amso challenged. However, eight years into this marriage, gone are the tears - they've been replaced by laughter up front instead of later.
I'd love to hear your stories! Leave a comment below!
 I realized the other day that I had never done a follow up post regarding my team's Relay for Life website, which you probably won't recall, but I had said I would let you know when it was up and running.
Behind the scenes of Noah and the Arks
While I hate to play favorites, I think of all the websites I've done so far, this is my favorite. It turned out well, if I do say so myself. It makes an impact. Let me tell you a little about this labor of love. Without a doubt, it was emotionally challenging to pull this site together, particularly after Ginny died. Even now, as I type this, tears are overwhelming me. Upon arriving to the site you'll land on a poem that my sister-in-law Kara wrote this past year as it became apparent that at least in Ginny's fight, cancer was winning. With that and her brother's own ongoing battle with cancer this poem had been building word by word, piece by piece in her mind and needing her testimonial for the website inspired her to take it from heart to paper.
Other things that you'll find while perusing the site are three stories. These stories can be found under the "Our reason for relaying" tab. Noah, our team's namesake, did an incredible job sharing his story - from learning of his diagnosis through treatment and what Relay for Life means to him. I can tell you, he completely wowed me the first time I read it. Paul is my dad and he was diagnosed with kidney cancer when I was five-years-old. He sat down with me and we wrote his tale of life with cancer. My dad was so incredibly lucky. I feel like I should note that while his kidney cancer is under control he has been diagnosed with skin cancer and has various procedures done about twice a year. For some reason we didn't broach that side of things on the site. And then there's Ginny's story. This year's Relay for Life will be on Ginny's birthday...Bittersweet. The story you'll find under her name is the one I wrote for Examiner.
Next on the site you'll find a growing page of ourteam's testimonials - why we relay. Each time another member of the team sends me their piece, I am wowed at the different approaches we all take in explaining why Relay for Life is so important to us. Five of our team members have contributed testimonials so far.
Our next tab takes you to money page - or how can you help? Here we have it set up for you to order luminaries for Relay (we're hoping to get a PayPal type thing going there soon), along with a list of our upcoming fundraisers. I feel I need to point out a hidden link on this page because it's incredible. On this page, you will find a link to one of our raffle items, which is a photo session with one of our team members. This link will take you to examples of her work and an accompanying song that for me is so powerful because it reminds me of Ginny. In fact, we used it in the video we made for her family.
I hope you'll check out our team's website and pass the link along. Be sure to sign the guest book! Oh, also on several of the pages throughout the website, you'll see ourHonor/Memory Roll, which lists the people we know with cancer and those who are no longer with us. In guest book land you can leave a message for us to add names to our list.
Noah and the Arks - Relay for Lifewww.noahrelayforlife.weebly.com *(Originally written/posted on November 6, 2010)
Today I was doing some research on one of the magazines I'm hoping to submit some articles to and via a comment to a post I happened upon a link to a blog authored by another individual pursuing this dream of writing. (Did you catch all that)?
The particular post I landed in asked the title question, "Am I a writer?" Essentially the post encourages those who are sitting in this boat, pondering that question to stop questioning, doubting, and lacking the general chutzpah and just own it. Yes, I am a writer. It's not about being published or making the big bucks - though those things are lovely, it's about this need to write. Period.
This came at a great time (gotta love a great God-incidence, don't you?), as I've been struggling with thinking I sound like a complete idiot when I tell people about committing myself to writing. I. Am. A. Writer. Phew. The book I'm reading about writing and publishing children's books said the same thing. You have to give yourself permission to not only take this seriously, but to take it seriously while expressing to those around you that this is it; you are a writer, this is a job, not a whim or a passing fancy. It's a passion we're hoping to go places with.
Again, this affirmation of taking ownership of this dream come to life couldn't have come at a more opportune time. Last night I applied for a National title with Examiner. Who knows if I'll get it (it can take up to two weeks to hear back), but if I don't get this one, I'm going to keep trying. I've got to keep pushing myself and how better than to reach for more exposure?
Talk about a baby stepper, huh? Think good thoughts for me as I wait to hear on the National title. I'll let you know, good, bad, or fabulous. So there it is: You better believe I'm a writer! Moving on.
*(Originally written/posted on September 25, 2010)
As a child I wanted to be a clown (mmmkay!), a teacher (I did actually major in this in college before finding a better fit), an artist (discovered I absolutely cannot draw), or an author. I love to write, love to write! It was only recently that I decided it was time to stop dreaming and wishing and start looking for opportunities to "write professionally."
My first jump into the land of paid publication was to look into a site that I'd frequently seen advertisements looking for writers. I have now been writing for the Billings edition of the Examiner.com as an Early Childhood/Parenting Examiner for just over a month. To check out my work with the Examiner, click here.
My aunt writes professionally and has been offering much appreciated guidance as I've been pondering my next move in the vast land that is "publishing." She's a great source of encouragement and wisdom and she made me realize that I cannot rely on this one source, I've got to be putting more pieces out there - "It is only those people who say they want to be a writer and never do anything that fail. If you work diligently at it - it is a job - you will succeed." -Pat Hansen
I have started working on some children's pieces for a publication my aunt informed me of as well as sending off a letter of interest to a local magazine. Admittedly, the idea of my work being published in an honest-to-goodness magazine is rather mind-boggling, but 20 years after making that initial declaration of wanting "to be an author," I'm pushing aside the little voices of self-doubt and the time has come for me to admit this is something I want and it's time to go after it!
Join me, won't you, as I work to follow my dream.*(Originally written on July 15, 2010)
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